Some habits we acquire as children, it seems we never quite seem to outgrow. Thumb-sucking usually doesn't last too long. But some things just seem inherent to human beings and stay with us, even as we age. And some of those things are super annoying- really.
If I could name just one thing that annoys me about human beings, and the human race, it would be excuses. I HATE excuses! "I'm late because of a wreck." "I can't pay you today because I lost my checkbook." "The kids aren't behaving well because we've been really busy and exhausted." or, one of my all-time favorites: "I didn't practice or bring my books to my piano lesson because they got wet in the shower." no, REALLY? I thought everyone took their piano books into the shower with mr. rubber ducky. Not! Every time I hear an excuse, I think of several comments I could make.
1) has it ever occurred to you that I just don't care? or maybe (gasp) that no one really cares about your lame excuse?
2) did you know that you are not the only individual in the world who has had a bad day/experienced inconvenient circumstances today? lots of people deal with a lot of stuff every day, and 9 changes out of 10, no one really needs to hear yours.
3) grow up. just...grow up and deal with it!
And, 9 chances out of 10, if I were to say any of these comments, the individual would be absolutely horrified, appalled, and completely offended. What's worse, they probably wouldn't even understand the reasoning for my frustration with their excuses. To them, their excuses are engrained in their nature, and are perfectly legitimate. These types of people are so accustomed to blaming others for their problems, that they escape reality and responsibility for their lives by making millions of excuses. "The kids distracted me, so I ran the red light." "My cell phone fell so I wrecked trying to reach it." (hint: it never works to blame inanimate objects...it just makes you look uber stupid.) and the list goes on and on. "The office has been working me really hard, so I didn't make it to church." etc. etc. etc.
Excuses often begin legitimately, and innocently, and maybe at first they truly are legitimate. However, when we begin placing blame for our problems- no matter how seemingly minute- on others, the dog, the pastor, the kids, the car, the red-light, whatever- we are essentially saying, "I am a victim of my environment, and I am not responsible for my reactions to daily life. The world is a tough place to live in, and life is hard on me. I can only deal with the cards I've been dealt in life. I am not responsible for my actions or responses to anything- I am a victim." The pattern here: lack of responsibility.
Irresponsibility creeps in so sneakily, you won't even recognize its clandestine patterns of deceit in your life. Some excuses may begin as legitimate. "I don't participate in youth activities because I don't have anything in common with anyone else." "I didn't practice because I had homework." "I didn't show up to practice because I forgot and got busy." But when you examine the root of the problem, how legitimate are your excuses, really?
-Not participating in activities because of lack of common ground isn't an excuse; it shows your inflexibility and unwillingness to get along with others and try to reach out to others.
-Not practicing piano because of homework is not a valid excuse either; it shows your failure to plan and prioritize your time and accomplish the most important tasks before goofing off.
-Skipping an appointment or scheduled meeting shows your lack of respect for another person's time, and your lack of responsibility in keeping track of your life. It's YOUR life, and no one can prioritize it for you.
Someone once told me something I've never forgotten: "You will make time for what's important to you. The things that aren't important will fall behind." It's all about accepting the challenge to be responsible for your actions, responses, and your life. Excuses mask the issues of irresponsibility and priorities. So the next time you catch yourself giving a lame excuse for being late or forgetting something, why not just try, "I'm sorry I'm late...my fault" instead. It goes over way better, and actually gets you out of thinking up a lame excuse- win, win situation.
It's your life. Be responsible for yours, and leave out the excuses, and everyone will take notice and love you for it!
Well, that's my profound thought for the day. week. make that month. :)
May your weekend be blessed.
